Tag Archives: coping with life

Snow is Falling…….La, La,La, La

Life Stressors, positive thinking,

Oh, sorry, I think I’ve missed the boat a bit. It’s just with all the talk of the snow we are due to get  I think I’ve regressed a month.

Folk in America have been warned to stay indoors, avoid unnecessary travel, stock up on basic provisions etc, etc. So it’s time to pull up the drawbridge for the next week or so for them.

The UK is due to get more than usual snow, nowhere near as much as America, but still, enough to cause some disruption. And so the moaning and complaining is rife.

If this was all happening in the run up to Christmas would we deal with it differently? Wouldn’t we reckon it came with the territory and just add it to the list of things to cope with.

But, come January, the tinsel is long gone, the credit card bills are in and we watch for the stretch in the days with bated breath. We are done with winter and just long for the suns warmth on our skin again. Our patience with nature is wearing thin.

Sadly we spend our time living for the highlights, the holidays, birthdays, Christmas, whatever; so much so that, to an extent, we become irritated with the in between bits. But that’s where the majority of all our lives happens.

I’m watching the snow fall now and loving the fact it makes my tatty, untidy garden look so pretty. If it slows down my travel tomorrow it will give me more time to notice the journey.

And when the snow is long gone I hope that effect stays. Enjoy your journey.

The King is Dead, Long Live the King.

Our World, women, ,

I have been watching with interest the controversy over the response from the western world to the death of King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia. The idea of Louise Mensch tweeting that Cameron should “Fuck off” initially made me laugh, but then rankled, going back again to the knee jerk reaction that benefits no-one and just gets people’s names in the headlines once more.

I agree Saudi Arabia has a very long way to go on equal rights for women, but 2015 is the first time women there will not only be able to vote, but to stand for election as well. It’s not everything, but it is a start. The recently deceased King Abdullah paved the way for this back in 2011.

Changing the ideology and way of life of centuries will not happen overnight in Saudi Arabia; any more than it did here. We are very quick to condemn the speed of change in other countries, but I would love to understand the reason behind the still howling gaps in career opportunities between men and women right here, right now.

In the past I have backed off from ever considering myself a “feminist”; being so sick of some of the nonsense associated with it. However I looked up the definition of the word earlier and realise it is a completely morally decent aspiration and one I am happy to identify with.

“Quel surprise” to all of you that know me! ( I don’t think).

Touching The Bottom….

Life Stressors, , ,

No, not that bottom!

A massively stress-inducing factor in life is uncertainty; of looking into that black pool and wondering where the bottom is.

Uncertainty seems to take away our options. We can’t do X because Y might happen.

So what, the worst happens! Now you know what you have to cope with, now you can make decisions, choose your course of action; in other words take control.

Yesterday I had a resolution to a long-running issue. It was not the resolution I had hoped for and yet, since that decision was made, I have felt so much lighter, so much more positive and in charge of my own destiny again. It’s as if others were pushing all the buttons, controlling way too many aspects of my life, for months.

And you know what, now that I’m back in the driving seat, I will enjoy the journey.

Down Time

Life Stressors, positive thinking, , ,

You can define this several ways.

A period of rest or recuperation.

A time of unhappiness…. or

A time of stepping outside of it all, to reflect and consider.

Sometimes disappointment cuts so deep it’s difficult to see a way out of the emotional cul-de-sac and a period feeling nothing at all can be a welcome break.

I’m not talking about wallowing aimlessly, but rather a time where I show myself the same kindness and understanding I would to a good friend. With enough time and space I can usually find the sense, the purpose of it all.

If we retire to lick our wounds and recover then we should come back again, stronger and more self-aware, but only if we leave bitterness behind; bitterness can play no part in healing or moving on.

Here’s to tomorrow.

Mental Blocks….

Life Stressors, positive thinking,

I would really love to know why, at times of heightened stress, does my mind, body, (whatever), prevent me carrying out the simplest of tasks that would undoubtedly help alleviate that stress.

Why do I mentally block my own path to relief?

I could blame the weather, the time of year and dozens of other meaningless fall-guys, but it comes down to me. It’s about me trying to hide from the issues nagging at my conscience and sabotaging my peace of mind.

And yes, of course we all know these things are often so innocuous, so easily sorted, as to be almost laughable; ALMOST.

I know I am not on my own, so tell me please, why do we do it?

The funny thing is I would tackle a dozen bigger tasks, simply to avoid that one thing; that crippling, soul-sucking thing that haunts my dreams. Then, to top it all, just in case the panic inside me threatens to bubble up, I shove it all back down with biscuits, chocolate or anything else that gives a momentary reprieve from it all.

So I am breathing deeply as I open my other laptop, switch it on and, as it boots up, I have already started scratching out the notes I need for my presentation.

What was all the fuss about?

Just Do It!

Life Stressors, , ,

Another hard day at Black Rock!

That’s how I feel when my stress levels are as high as they were earlier this evening. As I complained to my friend down the phone I stood outside of myself and thought,

“Oh shut up and just do it! Just do what you keep talking about and…LET….IT…GO!”

Now, I didn’t feel better that second, but the journey to a place of mental ease DID begin right away. My inner child wanted to continue my rant but thankfully my self-preservation won the day.

The problems are still there but my view of them is not obscured by the “red mist” of anger.

Finding Peace

Kind Thoughts, , , ,

I have witnessed someone close to me struggle with and shout at life for many, many years. Now, in a much weakened state, you would think they would see the sense in conserving their energy; energy that could help them regain better health. But, very sadly, I have found that inner turmoil and anger still to the fore. I can see it driven by fear now, as control of their life seems to be disappearing.

I used to believe I could help, that their unhappiness was my fault, but, thankfully, I have been able to break free from that misconception. It took a long time for me to understand, but, as I have touched on in recent posts, we are responsible for our own happiness and mental well-being.

I hope and pray my mother finds some inner peace and the joy of life that has eluded her all these years.

Aaaahhhhh………

Life Stressors, , ,

That’s the sigh of relief that comes with a sense of accomplishment. Okay, so I took a bit of a detour from my plan of getting the workie bits out of the way before I spent some time just suiting myself. I had a lovely relaxing bath, listened to my music and sang along to my hearts content. ( bet you are glad you couldn’t hear that bit. You should be).

But what’s it all about, honestly? I was nearly ready to go out and clean the dammed windows in the middle of the night rather than tackle that lousy report. And, you know, when I did actually start I had it sorted in, at the most, 15 minutes! Why oh why did I let that hang over me, like a huge axe about to fall, for the entire weekend.

Happily I am still in a very positive mood, but I am determined to stop allowing things like this to have so much power over me. I will take the control back from places, people or stuff that threatens to dominate me or my life.

No-one can break me without my co-operation.